Shame vs. guilt

It’s another cliched Brené Brown instagram-meme-ish topic, but the core is simple and useful:

Guilt = “I did something bad.”

Shame = “I am bad.”

Guilt says that doing something bad is out of character. Shame says that doing something bad is expected.

Guilt is useful for growth. Shame is toxic to growth.

Can you name the parts of yourself that make you feel shame? Try it. Write out a shame list. It’s hard, and it’ll take days of pondering. But there’s value in identifying the stuff standing in the way of your growth and joy.


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